July 18, 2024

Ah, Prague Castle! The granddaddy of all European castles, looking down on the city with the proud grace of a retired rock star. This monument isn’t just a piece of history, it’s the Mick Jagger of castles. Let’s dive into the lighter side of this UNESCO-listed gravity-defying pile of bricks.

History, or A Series of Home Makeovers?

Established in the 9th century, Prague Castle has been through more makeovers than a reality TV show contestant. Throughout its long life, every ruler seemed to have thought, “You know what this place needs? A new wing. And maybe some Gothic towers!” So over time, the castle got a mix of Romanesque basilicas, Gothic cathedrals, and Renaissance and Baroque buildings. Basically, if Prague Castle had an Instagram, it’d be filled with #ThrowbackThursdays from every conceivable era.

Castle or Small Country?

Spanning over 70,000 square meters, Prague Castle is said to be the largest ancient castle in the world. Walking through it feels like you’re on a never-ending treadmill of history. One might think the president, who officially resides here, would need a Segway just to get from his bedroom to the kitchen. “Honey, I’ll be there in 10 minutes; just crossing the 12th century!”

Where’s the Moat?

Any self-respecting castle would have a moat, right? Well, not this guy. Maybe the castle thought, “Who needs a moat when I’ve got this killer view?” From its perch, Prague Castle gives the kind of scenic city views that make postcards everywhere green with envy.

Defenestration: The Castle’s Favorite Word

And who could forget the defenestrations? Not a quirky dance or a rare bird species, but the act of throwing someone out of a window. It’s happened more than once here, proving that politics in Prague was literally a cutthroat (or rather, “throw-out-of-window”) business. If those walls could talk, they’d probably say, “Yep, saw another one fly today.”

In Conclusion…

Prague Castle isn’t just a building; it’s a rock star, a fashion icon, and an ancient witness to the swirling dance of history. When you visit, wear comfy shoes, bring a camera, and whatever you do, steer clear of open windows if you’re discussing politics. Just in case!